God-Centered Friends
When God is part of a relationship — when faith is shared, when friends pray together, when we are able to open the deepest parts of ourselves to discussion and revelation — it makes for a depth of friendship that is unparalleled. Here is how I know this to be true.
As a child, my family developed great friendships with people from our church. These people became like family to me and have been at every important event in my life for the last 30 years. Last week I had dinner with Karen and her husband Chip. I have known Karen, the youngest member of this "gang" of friends from church, since she was born. I was sitting across from her and realizing how easy it was to pick up where we left off, sharing about our families, lives, and our continued grief over the death of Bill, the first of our "gang" to pass away. We never talked about God at dinner, but God has always been integral to who we are as friends.
Last month I had the chance to spend an evening with my friend Barb. I met Barb at a church leadership program twenty-four years ago. Since then we have had the most amazing journey of friendship: sharing our most personal stories, deepest fears, greatest struggles, and most profound joys — and all from the distance of hundreds of miles.
The Christian music group, Who Do You Say I Am, sings a great song called Peace, My Friend. In it they sing,
Though the years may fall between us,
we must never fear the distance,
we are one in God forever,
in our minds and in our hearts.
Though it had been nearly a year since Barb and I had seen each other, we have always been "one in God," so the time and distance does not diminish our bond.
A friend once told me that she knew she had met the man of her dreams when, at the end of their first date, he invited her to pray with him. (I thought she was nuts at the time!) But when I had the chance to pray with a person whom I love, to express the depth of that relationship in a language of prayer, inviting God to be present to us, I finally understood what my friend had known immediately. God needs to be at the center of our lives, and that includes our relationships.
When you think about all of your most important relationships, is God at the center of them? How can you let your own relationship with God have an impact on your relationships with others?
The words of Sirach give us guidance in understanding friendship. Perhaps if we understand "faithful" to mean "full of faith in God" we will understand friendship better.
Faithful friends are a sturdy shelter;
whoever finds one has found a treasure.
Faithful friends are beyond price;
no amount can balance their worth.
Faithful friends are life-saving medicine;
and those who fear the Lord will find them.
- Sirach 6:14-16
We pray:
Thank you, God, for these faithful friends...
Keep us committed to each other and to you.
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Spirit Compass reflections are developed in partnership
with the Center for Ministry Development.